vermi11ion post 2

I really, really did not want to go to the trial. I did not think I would make it through.  But I had to be there to sit next to my brother in law and for Fawn.  I am ultimately glad I went.  To help myself get through when it got to be too much, my meditation tool box would take over.  I have been working on these tools for many, many years.  Maybe it was in preparation for this life altering event.  What meditation did was give me a deeper understanding and a deeper engagement with the courtroom, the people in it and the sounds. Meditation is not always done with closed eyes. 

My relationship with sound has changed since Fawn died. I have always been sound sensitive but my struggles with PTSD changed sound forever.  It is bizarre the sounds that can create an out of body experience for me and will leave me unsettled all day.  During the trial, sound had texture.  The tension in that courtroom was vibrating.  It was almost painful. This is where I began thinking about how sound would live with the absence of humanity.  

I knew I needed to create a piece of sound art for this exhibition.  I had absolutely no confidence when it came to sound. So I reached out to an old college friend and he recommended Chazlen Rook.  We met and I knew immediately she understood my crazy idea.  She recommended Cheyenne McCoy, who I knew from OKCGAS and STEPMOM.  Kya Millirons and I have been talking about collaborating on something for a few years. James Metcalf hopped on to share his experience and talent. They make a terrific team.  They are creating some deeply meaningful sound.